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Darth Ambiguous say "Relax": Don't Punish Bullies
Hey Poofta! Don’t try to run again. You, me, 3 o’clock. Under the water tower. I’m gonna bash your f**king face in!
Hey Poofta! Don’t try to run again. You, me, 3 o’clock. Under the water tower. I’m gonna bash your f**king face in!
Ahhhh, memories. Poofta, faggot, gay boy, I’ve heard them all. Fists, elbows, boots, I’ve felt them all. School wasn’t my favourite time of life.
The late 70’s wasn’t a time when bullying was seen as a problem. In fact, if you were a bully you were worshipped.
Look at me. I wasn’t the rugged bloke who was into footy: I hung out with the girls and liked science fiction. As an outsider I deserved to be singled-out as the freak I obviously was; and the thugs who derided, mocked and physically abused me were perfectly justified in their actions.
Or so they believed.
Over time the abhorrent activity of bullying has rightly been identified as a mammoth negative affect on both individuals and society. Leading to the announcement by Clubs NSW that any applicants found to have been bullies at school will have this held against them when applying for a job.
Not only won’t they get the job, but to make sure they know the reason why they didn’t get it (so they can to fix the errors in their ways), they won’t be told that it was because they were a bully in their school years.
Wait - what?
Clubs NSW should be acknowledged for helping to bring a social blemish into the limelight, but this is just as bad as rubbing a dog’s nose in their pee.
A bully who hasn’t been confronted with their actions and helped to break the cycle will continue to ruin the lives of those around them. Denying a lout a job and not telling them it was because of their bad attitude won’t help anyone.
Bullies learn their behaviour by being bullied by family or friends, or seeing the activity in the school ground and emulating it. The way to stop it is to break the cycle in childhood, not at the job application phase when the activity is ingrained into the thug’s psyche.
Because you’ve got to remember that a bully, like a puppy, is for life.
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Some personal thoughts from my good friend Stephen. I too was ostracised at school. I loved reading, drama and playing soccer. Unfortunately I attended a Rugby League school where you, well played Rugby League pretty much. Soccer was a poofter’s game. Reading was for nerds. Drama, acting and singing was for fairies.
Don’t get me wrong - I didn’t suffer the levels of bullying that so many other people did. Most of it was vicious rumours and insults but I was reasonably insular even back then. It hurt, especially the parts about sexuality (I was painfully shy around girls but was definitely interested in them), but in retrospect I’m a little surprised at my level of resilience now I think back on it.
Sadly not all of my friends were as lucky as me and copped far worse. It’s simply not acceptable and the bullies don’t realise just how deep the words scar and the level of pain they’re really inflicting. I’d like to think some of them would stop if they realised but we all know a few of them would only be inspired further.
But, as Stephen says, this idea isn’t the answer. Mainly because we’re talking about kids here. Telling a child - even a teen - that bullying now will hurt their job prospects later is like telling the average person about health strategies for when they turn 90. It’s simply not something they/we think about. Young kids aren’t thinking about jobs and even if they are it’s what they want to be, not that they won’t be able to do it.
Adult perspective for a youth-oriented problem. Not the answer.
Yet another special day… heterosexual pride? wtf?
We live in a world full of causes, charities, celebrations and a multitude of multi-coloured rubber wristbands. It seems you can’t turn around without it being National Executive Assistant Day, a parade to celebrate the follicly challenged, or a festival for the enhancement of linguistically localised phraseology.
So I suppose it was probably inevitable that we would eventually have Heterosexual Pride Day. Yes a Brazilian council has enacted legislation creating a day to celebrate… well “traditional” straight sex it would seem. *sigh
If only I lived in America as a kid, during the 80’s I would have cut up my Marvel comics and sent away for these amazing sea creatures and watched as they came alive before my very eyes. They would have been ALIVE I tell you!
Then I would have trained them (“obey your commands like a pack of friendly trained seals”) to rise up against the bullies at school so I could become king of the world! They would have paid for the taunts they threw at me. Yes, oh yes, if I had only have lived in America, those bastards would have been first against the wall once my army of Sea-Monkeys had taken over the Earth.
Mother and Father would have been so proud of me as I commanded the Sea-Monkeys to do my bidding: ending world hunger and uniting the countries of this pathetic planet into one glorious empire (“What a way to surprise your guests.”)!
C’est la vie.
Further proof that Stephen and I have so much in common it’s scary. I wanted Sea-Monkeys so badly I would have cut up my beloved Star Wars comics…
FACING UP TO THE LAW
or HOW A BAD PERSON GOT AWAY WITH DOING BAD STUFF BUT HER RELIGION ISN’T IMPORTANT
social commentary by Anthony Sherratt
There’s an old story about a man on trial for murder. All the evidence - including DNA and a witness - point towards his guilt and it seems a fait accompli until his twin brother takes the witness stand and confesses. The man is released and the twin arrested. However, during the twin’s trial the first man takes the stand and he too confesses. The jury, unaware of the first trial, has reasonable doubt and acquits. Because of double jeopardy neither man can be charged again.
I was reminded of this story this week when the tale of Ms Carnita Matthews and her refusal to remove her burqa re-emerged. The burqa incident in NSW has received a lot of media attention and, sadly, far too much from those fanning flames of anti-muslim agendas.
For those unfamiliar with the case, a quick recap: It all started last June when a police officer pulled Ms Matthews over for a random breath test. When he booked her for not displaying her P plates properly she got angry and claimed “all cops are racist”. The next day she entered the police station and accused the officer of not only racism but of trying to tear the burqa off her face.
Unbeknownst to her the entire incident was caught on police car’s on-board camera and he was cleared. And the little girl who cried wolf/racist was charged with making a deliberately false statement, found guilty and sentenced to six months jail.
The case took a bizarre turn this week when an appeals judge found that as police could not prove that it was her that actually made the statement - because she again refused to remove her burqa when she made the false statement - he couldn’t be reasonably sure that it was actually her. So she escaped punishment.
It’s no surprise this caused some uproar. Nor is it a surprise that those making the most noise are the same old knee-jerk reactionaries who cry racism (or reverse racism), double standards and making generalisations about Muslims.
The simple matter of it all however is that Ms Matthews is an individual. Her actions are no more representative of her culture in the same way the drunken antics of a caucasian male on a Friday night don’t reflect the average christian/white person.
Yes, this case does grate emotionally because it feels as if she is playing the system; as if she’s using her religion as a way to avoid due process. Personally I have a strong negative emotional response towards her as it appears she’s not taking personal responsibility for her own actions and using trickery in a smug way to do so.
And making a false accusation, whether it be racism or rape, only makes it harder for others who truly ARE victims to come forward and be believed.
However, the talkback shows, xenophobes and extremist christians who are using this to criticise Islam and those who practice it, are acting just as poorly if not worse. We’re a multi-cultural country and they need to start accepting that people are entitled to different beliefs and that religious beliefs are to be respected even if you don’t agree with them.
Fear mongering on the other hand should never be tolerated.
Yes there’s a lot in this case that leaves a lot to be desired. I hope police are now trained to call a female officer if someone refuses to show their face. Or possibly finger print them if they make accusations to ensure it is actually them. I hope the Muslim community doesn’t act like Ms Matthews’ supporters outside the court and give the haters an excuse. Acting aggressively was unnecessary and only served to underscore a negative stereotype of an angry sub-section of the community who have no interest in being part of the larger society. This is patently unrepresentative but doesn’t help anyone.
Interestingly in the case of the twins murder trial justice was still served when the District Attorney charged them both with perjury (lying under oath) and they were sentenced to 25 years jail, so they still paid the price.
Sadly in the case of Ms Matthews, with the fear mongerers and xenophobes criticising an entire religion for her actions, I fear it’s her culture that is paying a price.
Lyrics I hear but don’t listen to PART 3
So I’ve been humming along whenever this song comes on the radio, not listening to the lyrics (damn you catchy hook) or even knowing who’s singing.
But then I finally listen to the words. I’m talking about Price Tag by Jessie J.
Here’s the chorus:
It’s not about the money, money, money
We don’t need your money, money, money
We just wanna make the world dance,
Forget about the price tag
Couple of quick things:
a) It’s not about the money? You just want to make the world dance? How idealistic of you, though something’s not quite right. It appears itunes still wants to charge me for the single. Did you put it up for free download on your website? Hmm, no, not there either. Or are you just saying we can indeed torrent this one without guilt as long as we dance?
b) Seriously? You’re rhyming “world dance” with “price tag”? I hope you don’t need my money, money, money because you need to hire a real lyricist. Grrrr.
And don’t even start me on ‘rhyming’ “money, money, money” with “money, money, money”.
A Danish politician has called on their tourism ads to feature TOPLESS WOMEN to scare away immigrants
This story is more about racism and knee-jerk politics than a racy, sexy angle.
The politician believes if his country is portrayed as a flesh zone then undesirable immigrants (ie of the islamic faith) will choose to move elsewhere.
I don’t know where to start with this stupidity and close-mindedness so I’m just going to brand it ignorant and ridiculous and move on.
One of the most frustrating aspects of lecturing on the media and journalism is the amount of students who expect to go straight to a major magazine or newspaper or waltz into a high-profile TV job without having done any hard work. We go blue in the face explaining how you need as much experience as you can get. That you should have been working on your portfolio throughout university (if not from even before then). And that, in all likelihood you may need to work a less-than-glamorous job for awhile before graduating to the big leagues, idealist or not. And it’s not really about paying your dues so much as understanding how to see the big picture, how to write the story and how to chase the facts (not just check twitter and the net).
One of our graduating students this year became very frustrated at the Graduating Students Workshop we held when she demanded to know how to get the glamour job in Sydney she coveted. We each took turns advising her to look at a regional job for a year or two to gain experience and build a portfolio. When she dismissed that notion a very talented alumni (and one of my favourite ex-students) who worked her way up through the ranks (she writes for TIME magazine now) suggested she may even have to look at working for free for some time to gain contacts and prove she could do the job. This merely prompted her to angrily snort “I’ve just spent three years at university working for free. I’m not doing that anymore”.
A couple of things for aspiring journos:
a) there isn’t money in journalism. You will work long hours for minimum reward (some good perks depending on your beat).
b) the glamour jobs in the industry are extremely, extremely limited and you either have to have years and years of experience or a very pretty face and contacts.
c) Being a graduate guarantees you nothing. Your degree simply means you have the basic training and won’t be a total newsroom newbie. Some are awesome and some are pathetic. Some of the best journalists got there with no degree but lots of determination. Interestingly they are the ones who spent time working in regionals learning the trade and building a portfolio.
d) Even the very talented graduates may struggle. The truly excellent ones who ‘get it’ (we have three or four each year) will probably be able to pick and choose. The rest of you will have to work your way up to your dream job. I’m not saying you can’t do it. I’m simply saying don’t expect to get there immediately without hard work.
There is way too much truth in this video.
“Want you to make me feel like I’m the only girl in the world”
In response to Rihanna’s new song:
a) don’t make me responsible for your insecurities and self-image. That’s something you need to work out for yourself out to be truly happy and healthy. I’ll support you but not if you make demands based on selfish gameplaying/whining.
b) what would be special about wanting you if you were the only woman left? I prefer to point out to my beloved that there are billions of girls in the world but she’s the one I want to be with forever.
dcu:
I couldn’t decide whether to ruin your day or make it better…
Honestly? Things that aren’t cool, especially from daily dcu. Don’t mock the cosplay folks. That guy has just as much right to as anyone, and the level of body and fat shame in this post and some of the comments make me sick.
Oh for god’s sake! One of the things I love about conventions and cosplaying is seeing how happy people are. And how tolerant and accepting people are. Brisnova this year was wonderful because so many people were happy and laughing. Actually pretty much everyone. I say good on you big batman. You’re smiling and enjoying yourself.
And to the rest of you laughing and making snide comments. You make me both sad and sick.
Laughing at others isn’t cool. And it makes you look uglier than any of your taunts or sniggering.
You tell ‘em Odysseus!
I hate that face. I hate the concept that girls feel the need to make a certain face for effect rather than just relax and/or smile. And there’s not enough smiling. I blame supermodels who seem unable to smile. Maybe their low calorie intake affects the muscles around their mouths. /rant
even webcomics like hark, a vagrant hate duckface!
I want to celebrate but...
Well, the Australian Government has announced they’re going to shelve their controversial (and ridiculous) plan to censor the internet by forcing ISPs to run a filter that is open to terrible abuse.
I’d say “thank god they’ve seen the light” but what appears to be really happening here is the government has seen the numbers of the petitions (largest online petition in Australia’s history) and decided to put it off till after the election which is about to be announced any day now.
Just to make sure.
Just so you know “shelving” a plan is a political expediency to avoid exposure.
I’ll celebrate when they realise it needs to be scrapped altogether for so many reasons.
I've been saying this for years...
He (Stew) has. And so have I. Games (like most things) aren’t inherently evil or going to automatically mean the degradation of children’s behaviours and morals. It’s just not that simple. It’s a combination of values, perceptions, upbringing and even a bit of genetic disposition. Maybe even hormonal balance.
At the end of the day parents need to take some responsibility for their kids learning about life. Whether it be sex or violence and whether it’s games, movies or the internet, your role as a guardian of your kids means YOU need to explain things. It’s YOUR responsibility to equip your children with the ability to understand the respect and the difference between right and wrong.
It’s a really interesting article. It also probably says something about our tendency to see the worst of something overlooking how some people could take it quite completely differently.
(via stewartcook)
“Getting answers wrong makes me feel stupid”
VENTING: A student said this to me today. A university student. She was questioning why we have to do “quizzes” in class.
Well, not really questioning. Criticising. And a few other students agreed with her.
I thought she was joking at first but then she pushed a bit on the subject and, when I spoke to her after the tute, she was adamant she and her fellow students shouldn’t have to do them.
She grudgingly admitted the research exercises might be teaching them a thing or two but repeated she’d prefer to not do them because it made her feel stupid.
Just for the record - the students are given 10 questions, 15 minutes and full internet access. And they’re journalism students. The questions are not that hard though of course there are some tricks here and there.
We’ve been working on techniques of online research and searching in both lectures and tutes and yet some students can’t get past wikipedia or the first page of google. Or check accuracy. Or double source. Or know what to type into google.
But now the answer to some mixed results seems to be so clear. We shouldn’t give them a test because it may make them feel bad. I shudder to think how their sensibilities will react when they hand in their assignments and I’m forced to assign a grade. Maybe we should do away with assignments as well.
Heck, let’s just start handing out degrees for attendance.
Contextual postscript:
I really love lecturing and tutoring. It’s something I truly enjoy. Being given the opportunity to challenge, teach, push and guide is something I’m grateful for and I think I’m pretty good at it.
My style is a little more casual than most academics as I prefer to try to speak to the students in context and in practical terms. I love making them think and question their beliefs. In short I want to help them think for themselves and encourage a future life where they’re never afraid to ask questions both of themselves and those around them.
It’s an energetic style that requires a fair bit of prep time and enthusiasm but I’m more than happy to put it in because of what I get out of it.
But sometimes it can be somewhat disheartening.
